Caring and nice and pleasant and easy-going: what people have said about me.
Do they know I am me + medication?
My emotions are dull and weakened…nothing offends or hurts. Say what you will…I will probably laugh.
Take away my medicated bubble however, and what am I?
I get hurt, and you dismiss it as a joke.
I am upset, and you tell me I am being unreasonable.
You don’t know what to say in response to me because this me, you’re unfamiliar with. You don’t know how to handle me here, and I can bet you’re hoping it’s a moment and like the tides, will shift.
I have been this person to you, now I seem to be another.
Can you like me as I am, or am I too foreign…
Was I more palatable subdued and devoid of extreme?
I want to be loved…but I fear I can only be truly loved when I am acceptable. Is this risk I’m taking, seeing myself emerge from this shelter, worth it or am I on the verge of ruining every steady relationship?
I want to know the true me again.
I want to feel my aches and pains and every color of my emotions.
But I continue to ask….is it worth it…